matty
10-11-2006, 06:14 PM
So Monday night I go to a coffee house Bangg recommended called Vera's. It's nice, had some coffee, read a magazine. I asked the gruff, coffee-slinging lesbian if she knows of any "family friendly" places nearby. She recommends the Bryant Lake Bowl, a super cute little bowling alley/bar very close. So I wander over, grab a pint, and slip outside to smoke a cigarette.
Outside is a young man smoking and nervously looking up and down the street. It was very cold, and he was just wearing a t-shirt, which I commented on. We became instant friends. His name is Terry (male, cauc., 31 y/o) and he's waiting on his friend Chuck. Terry and I talk and drink for about 45 minutes, when Chuck finally shows up. (Chuck is obviously on AndiKay time, which is not to be confused with Carissa time, which is approximately 1 hour and 20 minutes.)
Terry had warned me about Chuck. Chuck is a five foot nothing little Asian guy, 38 years old, and full of bravado and trash-talking, but a lovable character nonetheless. So we move inside, have a couple more drinks (Paulaner on tap, y'all!), and then Chuck starts talking about moving on to another bar in the Warehouse District called Fahrenheit. They invite me along, and sure I'll go, what the hell. Chuck drove. Chuck is our ride. Oh, Chuck.
We get to Fahrenheit and start to go in, but unfortunately Terry had lost his ID when he got drunkenly mugged a month ago. I turn to tell Chuck we can't go in, and Chuck is GONE. I chase him down before I have to pay an $8 cover and tell him we have to go. He says, "Just give me a minute and I'll be right out." My bullshit meter went off, five alarms. I go outside and tell Terry, "He'll just be a minute," and Terry says, "Oh shit we're going to be here all night." So we stand around for a while, talking and smoking, and I have to piss, so I run across the street to a totally empty bar called Bootleggers where they hassle me about using the restroom without buying anything. When I get back across the street to Fahrenheit, Terry says Chuck just came out but since I was pissing he ran back in and said he'd be back out in five.
Twenty minutes later, we're huddled up to the bouncers for warmth. We have now been waiting on Chuck for about 45 minutes, but we were having a good time. These two PHAT white Rolls pulled up and a bunch of black gangsters got out and went in the bar. One of them had a purple fur pimp coat. Sweet.
Finally, the bouncers let me run in to talk to Chuck. I tell Chuck we need to go like NOW, and he proceeds to introduce me to all these young Asian girls he was hitting on. He tries to buy me a drink. I say no, let's go. He says I'll meet you out there in five. I go back outside Chuckless, and the doorman says, "Hey, is the only reason you can't go in 'cause Terry doesn't have his ID?" "Yeah." "Go ahead in." He opens the velvet rope, and inside we go.
Terry can fucking DRINK. I was talking up Missourians' drinking ability, but Terry has super powers. We drink a lot, dance a lot, and then discover Chuck, leaning on the bar, a puddle of puke at his feet. He looks awful. Terry and I acknowledge this, shrug, and go back to the dance floor.
The bar closes and we drag Chuck outside, where he clings to a tree and pukes up everything he's ever eaten. Terry and I drunkenly run around and talk to the peeps, watch a pretty good fight start and end, and Terry tried to get in one of the Rolls but is stopped. (Stopped and not murdered, thank goodness.) Finally, we drag Chuck back to his SUV, wait about fifteen more minutes while he pukes out of his window, and then I start to drive us back in the direction of my car. Terry, while a very sweet guy, has no idea how to give directions, and he's super drunk. And he keeps hitting on every black girl we see, who are usually accompanied by black men four times my size. (But friendly! Everybody is so fucking friendly in Minneapolis! It's great!)
So Terry takes over driving. He takes me to my car, then he's going to get directions out of the nearly-dead Chuck, and we're going to crash Chuck's house and drink some more because Terry wants to see Chuck's hot-girl roommate. I follow in my car. We go Uptown a bit, and Terry runs back to my car and says this is it. We get out and hassle Chuck about which apartment he's in.
"I don't live here!" Chuck screams. "You drove me to my old apartment! Why did you do that?"
"Because you gave me directions here, Chuck," Terry said. "Where DO you live?"
"St. Paul!"
"Fuck."
So I'm not going to St. Paul, and I give Terry three beers for the road. I also gave him info on the Board, so we'll see if he joins us. I hope he does.
It was a fun last night in Minneapolis!
Outside is a young man smoking and nervously looking up and down the street. It was very cold, and he was just wearing a t-shirt, which I commented on. We became instant friends. His name is Terry (male, cauc., 31 y/o) and he's waiting on his friend Chuck. Terry and I talk and drink for about 45 minutes, when Chuck finally shows up. (Chuck is obviously on AndiKay time, which is not to be confused with Carissa time, which is approximately 1 hour and 20 minutes.)
Terry had warned me about Chuck. Chuck is a five foot nothing little Asian guy, 38 years old, and full of bravado and trash-talking, but a lovable character nonetheless. So we move inside, have a couple more drinks (Paulaner on tap, y'all!), and then Chuck starts talking about moving on to another bar in the Warehouse District called Fahrenheit. They invite me along, and sure I'll go, what the hell. Chuck drove. Chuck is our ride. Oh, Chuck.
We get to Fahrenheit and start to go in, but unfortunately Terry had lost his ID when he got drunkenly mugged a month ago. I turn to tell Chuck we can't go in, and Chuck is GONE. I chase him down before I have to pay an $8 cover and tell him we have to go. He says, "Just give me a minute and I'll be right out." My bullshit meter went off, five alarms. I go outside and tell Terry, "He'll just be a minute," and Terry says, "Oh shit we're going to be here all night." So we stand around for a while, talking and smoking, and I have to piss, so I run across the street to a totally empty bar called Bootleggers where they hassle me about using the restroom without buying anything. When I get back across the street to Fahrenheit, Terry says Chuck just came out but since I was pissing he ran back in and said he'd be back out in five.
Twenty minutes later, we're huddled up to the bouncers for warmth. We have now been waiting on Chuck for about 45 minutes, but we were having a good time. These two PHAT white Rolls pulled up and a bunch of black gangsters got out and went in the bar. One of them had a purple fur pimp coat. Sweet.
Finally, the bouncers let me run in to talk to Chuck. I tell Chuck we need to go like NOW, and he proceeds to introduce me to all these young Asian girls he was hitting on. He tries to buy me a drink. I say no, let's go. He says I'll meet you out there in five. I go back outside Chuckless, and the doorman says, "Hey, is the only reason you can't go in 'cause Terry doesn't have his ID?" "Yeah." "Go ahead in." He opens the velvet rope, and inside we go.
Terry can fucking DRINK. I was talking up Missourians' drinking ability, but Terry has super powers. We drink a lot, dance a lot, and then discover Chuck, leaning on the bar, a puddle of puke at his feet. He looks awful. Terry and I acknowledge this, shrug, and go back to the dance floor.
The bar closes and we drag Chuck outside, where he clings to a tree and pukes up everything he's ever eaten. Terry and I drunkenly run around and talk to the peeps, watch a pretty good fight start and end, and Terry tried to get in one of the Rolls but is stopped. (Stopped and not murdered, thank goodness.) Finally, we drag Chuck back to his SUV, wait about fifteen more minutes while he pukes out of his window, and then I start to drive us back in the direction of my car. Terry, while a very sweet guy, has no idea how to give directions, and he's super drunk. And he keeps hitting on every black girl we see, who are usually accompanied by black men four times my size. (But friendly! Everybody is so fucking friendly in Minneapolis! It's great!)
So Terry takes over driving. He takes me to my car, then he's going to get directions out of the nearly-dead Chuck, and we're going to crash Chuck's house and drink some more because Terry wants to see Chuck's hot-girl roommate. I follow in my car. We go Uptown a bit, and Terry runs back to my car and says this is it. We get out and hassle Chuck about which apartment he's in.
"I don't live here!" Chuck screams. "You drove me to my old apartment! Why did you do that?"
"Because you gave me directions here, Chuck," Terry said. "Where DO you live?"
"St. Paul!"
"Fuck."
So I'm not going to St. Paul, and I give Terry three beers for the road. I also gave him info on the Board, so we'll see if he joins us. I hope he does.
It was a fun last night in Minneapolis!